Things I do instead of writing... or, how to stop procrastinating
Petey can get his hours in. He’s already on chapter 2.
There are a lot of things I do instead of writing. Here are just a few:
This was supposed to be a quick, 15 minute activity. It was not.
Clean shit. Now this is a big one. Because shit is dirty. And it NEEDS to be done. But at the end of the night when I’ve cleaned everything, and the house looks amazing and my hands are all dry and my homemade pedicure is smudged, what I really regret is not taking the time, at least some of it- to answer that nagging voice telling me to write. And that maybe I didn’t need to pull all of the clothes out of the closet to see if they spark joy.
Eat snacks and watch TV. You could also say “drink wine and watch Netflix on my phone” if you really wanted to be specific. But right now I am so desperate for time alone that I often end up sitting on the floor of my bedroom drinking wine and watching TV on my phone just so no one will talk to me.
Someone brought a keg to sledding. Crazy move or brilliant? I’m not sure. But the filling of the cup came right back to me.
Plan things. In an effort to feel like some part of my life is under my control, I make a lot of lists. I mean, a lot. I write down meals I’m going to make, what I’m going to buy at Target, outfits I want to look at online and debate if I am the type of person who just wears random dresses all the time. But the constant planning stunts creativity, leaves no room for inspiration and certainly no space for anyone else to make decisions about food, events of the day or if you need to wear a hat. You do. OK? Until April. Hats all around.
Apparently I wasn’t planning at all when I bought pounds and pounds of oatmeal, one grocery trip at a time.
Have complicated bedtime routines starting at 8:30 and extending until 11 that involve TV, social media, pacing around, folding some laundry, doing terrible pedicures, stretching for two minutes, worrying and then feeling guilty for not being more “present” for my family. This is despite being literally present for them since 6:30 am when I facilitated their morning activities and tried to do yoga that doesn’t hurt my already injured foot in the living room surrounded by clean but unfolded laundry.
Worry. Worry about what you will think, if writing is a waste of time and I should be doing something else and if it’s too ambitious or crazy to consider writing as a real THING. Oh, I can shoot myself down before I get out the door. Or even put my shoes on. Do you do this too? Think about all of the things that are possibly in your way and spend energy and time on all of the bad things that MIGHT happen. What I really want to do is to stop spending so much time planning and wondering about what might happen. Is that how everyone feels?
So here is what I’m going to do:
Make a plan to write the way I made a plan to run a road race.
Write before doing other things. I’m currently injured (annoying foot injury) so I’m going to use my running time for writing time.
Tell people I’m going to write more. People. I’m going to write more often.
Ask my friends what is is that they aren’t doing that they want to be doing. Then I’ll check on them and ask them about it all the time, because I know how easy it is to lose sight of that pulling on your heart telling you to do something else.
I mean, it’s not like I haven’t done ANY writing.